Kinross makes the news

by wee_fee-Fee Fri 1 Feb - 17:18:52

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/tayside_and_central/7221830.stm

No power at home. Aint I lucky am at work. Haha

by Gordy88 Fri 1 Feb - 18:02:18

Just an update on the Kinross disaster,,,

A bus crash has caused major dramas and power interruption in Kinross

Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly, muttering "Ya Baassa".
The Crash decimated the area causing approximately £30 worth of damage.
Several priceless collections of mementos from Majorca and the Costa Del
Sol were damaged beyond repair.

Three areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many locals were
woken well before their giros arrived. Kinross FM reported that hundreds
of residents were confused and bewildered and were still trying to come to
terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in Kinross.

One resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5 said, "It
was such a shock, my little Chardonnay-Mercedes came running into my bedroom
crying. My youngest two, Tyler-Morgan and Victoria-Storm slept through
it all. I was still shaking when I was skinning up and watching Trisha the
next morning." Apparently looting, muggings and car crime were
unaffected and carried on as normal.

The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny
Delight to the area to help the stricken locals. Rescue workers are
still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal
belongings, including benefit books, jewellery from Elizabeth Duke at
Argos and Bone China from Poundland.
HOW CAN YOU HELP?

This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for those
unfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is most
sought after - items most needed include:
Fila or Burberry baseball caps
Kappa tracksuit tops (his and hers)
Shell suits (female)
White sport socks
Rockport boots
Any other items usually sold in Primark.

Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same.
Required foodstuffs include:
Microwave meals
Tins of baked beans
Ice cream
Cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew.
22p buys a biro for filling in the compensation forms.
£2 buys chips, crisps and blue fizzy drinks for a family of 9. £5 buys
B&H
and a lighter to calm the nerves of those affected.

**Breaking news**
Rescue workers found a girl in the rubble smothered in raspberry
alco-pop.
'Where are you bleeding from?' they asked," Falkirk" said the girl,
"woss that gotta do wiv you?

Please don't forward this to anyone living in Kinross - oh, sod it, they
won't be able to read it, anyway.

We're thinking of you Fee

laughing